I LOVE NEW HOUSES

by blane stuart land

We have a new house! Today when we moved in with all the boxes and furniture, I could see lots of prospects for a wonderful time. Just think! Mama will be busy with all of those boxes and unpacking and I will be perfectly free to explore my new domain.

Chapter I

MY VERY OWN ROOM

I have my very own room in the new house. It's way down at the other end of the hall from the kitchen and really private except when Mamma comes down to check on me or look in on Barbara Fay - that's my new baby sister. She can't quite get around yet. - Daddy has put up my bed and has moved my chest of drawers in the room and of course my toy box. I thought I'd just see what is kept in that chest of drawers and do you know what I found! In one drawer I found a pair of the prettiest red shoes. I tried and tried to get them on but having no luck I asked Mamma to help me. She kept saying that "Yes" they were mine but that my feet wouldn't fit into them now because they were my bedroom slippers when I was much smaller. I don't ever remember seeing them before and I don't see why I can't get them on if they're mine. I tried and I tried and finally threw a fit. Next time I looked for them I couldn't find them so I guess Mamma put them away. She does that sometimes when I'm not looking. I also found out just where my shirts and pants are and since I didn't think that they should be in that particular drawer I started to unpack it, intending of course to just change a few things around. As luck would have it that was one of those times when Mamma came checking. I can still feel that spanking! Mammas sure are hard to understand at time!

Chapter II

A HELPING HAND

Mamma sure has been busy unpacking and getting everything straight and since I'm getting to be a big boy I think I should help. I usually help Mamma wash the dishes because the new sink has a spray on it. That's the nicest thing to play with. I spray off the soap after Mamma has washed the dishes, but in-between times I have fun just spraying it around. The other night I'm not sure just what happened but I ended up in bed before it was even time to go to bed. I was just spraying around and before I knew it the spray had wet the whole kitchen up, including Mamma. I don't understand yet just how it happened.

I always like to look when Mamma puts in the wash but I'm not quite big enough yet to put the clothes in the washing machine. The other day while Mamma was putting the clothes in to wash I saw the funniest looking machine behind the door. Of course I wanted to see just what this thing was since I couldn't remember having ever seen one. It has a bright red knob on it so I turned it around and around. I like to turn things around. Before I knew it Mamma grabbed me and ran out of the little house. (We have a little house to do the washing in). She went next door and do you know that that lady has a machine just like the one we do? Mamma was all excited and asking her about something about gas so I decided to see if this machine has a red knob on it too. It did so I reached down to turn it too. About that time though a hand grabbed me and away we went - back home. Then Mamma and I had a little talk (her doing all the talking) about not touching things I know nothing about, etc. Guess I'd better be careful about that - 'specially when Mamma is around. Daddy came home and turned that little knob again though and everything was all right.

I just don't understand woman - especially Mamma.

She is awfully busy sometimes and just doesn't get to look at books very much. I found a very interesting one with pictures of Mamma in it too. She was back taking care of Barbara. Babysister can't even eat at the table but has to be fed - so I took some of the pictures back so she could look at them. The book was just too big and heavy for me, though, so I tore the pictures out. I liked them the best anyway. I handed them to Mamma with a smile. She smiled at first and then I guess she remembered where they came from because all at once the smile disappeared and she went dashing into the living room. I can't touch books anymore!

I help her with baby sister some too. When Mamma bathes her I soap her back and get to put the water on it. When she fusses, too, I tell Mamma to pick her up. Sometimes Mamma thinks she ought to stay in bed anyway so I stand at the side of the bed and talk to her. She doesn't talk yet but just grins and makes funny sounds so I like to talk to her. Barbara has a basket at one end of her bed with powder, lotion, bootees and lots of things in it. She takes vitamins just like mine, too and that's where she keeps it. We were playing one day and I thought maybe she would like some because I like mine a lot and wish Mamma would give me more than she does, so I gave her some. I just kept giving them to her, so she could have all she wanted. I don't think much got in her mouth, though. I kept having trouble squeezing at the right time to get the drops to come out and it got all over her little slip and her bed. I'm not to help give Barbara her vitamins any more. Mamma will be the only one to do that from now on!

Chapter III

MECHANICALLY MINDED

You know cars are really interesting to me. I like to pretend I'm driving sometimes and I go all sorts of places. Our car is sometimes parked in front of our new house instead of in our new driveway because of the workmen's trucks that are there, so I just went out one day and climbed in, intending to take a trip. Then all of a sudden I really knew how to drive. The car was moving but something was wrong because I was going backwards. When I stopped (or rather the car) I looked around and there I was in the neighbor's front yard. No one was anywhere and I couldn't get the door open so I started crying, pretty sure that someone would turn up then. They did - and from all directions! First the nice lady that lives next door, then Mamma came dashing out. They looked so surprised that I could drive. I guess they were a little upset because I didn't drive in the right direction and got on the nice lady's new grass. Mamma sure was shaking and the next day when I told her I was going for a drive in the car she said it was no place for me to be playing. Gosh! A fella can't do anything any more.

One morning after breakfast while Mamma was doing the dishes I found a wire with a plug on one end and nothing on the other. I've always been curious just how those things go in the wall so I fooled around with it until it finally went in. I was so excited I ran to show Mamma. She came in to see what I was so excited about. All she did was bend over, take it out of the wall and put it up high out of my reach, muttering something like "what next." Then she hugged me and told me that little boys shouldn't play with wires and plugs and didn't I remember all the spankings I had gotten for being so curious about them before. She sure did look white!

Chapter IV

SO BIG!

When we moved into this new house and I saw that it was so pretty and new I decided I'd like to try the new potties out. So one day, instead of wetting my pants, I climbed up on the seat, squatted, and watched with interest as I did my business. When Mamma saw me she just hugged and hugged me and stayed right there and watched with me. We were really proud of me. I was SO BIG. I decided I was SO BIG that I'd try going all by myself one time and since my big boy pants weren't on me (Mamma has to help me get them off in a hurry) I pattered into the bathroom. After finishing I discovered I could stand up on the seat and play in the water in the sink. Since I know Mamma doesn't like me to do this very much I closed the door. When I was through splashing around in the water I decided to get out. The door knob has the cutest little button on it that I guess is supposed to unlock the door. I carefully punched it in and turned the knob while holding the button down and I haven't figured out yet why it didn't work right. Anyway I yelled for Mamma to push the door and I guess she didn't push very hard. The door wouldn't open and I thought I'd have to stay in there - imagine, no toys, no nothing! - so I just started crying. Mamma said to hush and wait just a minute and I could get out easily. Then she came back with a key and let me out. You know, I don't think that little button is supposed to let you out after all.

Since I was so clean after playing in the water I wanted to smell sweet too, so I got my powder and put some on me. It smelled really sweet! Mamma was in the bathroom cleaning up some water that had spilled on the floor somehow so I thought of a good surprise for her. I would make my whole room smell sweet! I sprinkled powder all over the room and it looked so pretty and white. Besides that, when I walked out of the room I could see just where my feet had been. I guess Mamma just doesn't like the smell of the powder. She took it away from me (it was empty anyhow) and didn't even try to clean the powder up. She just closed the door and told me to either stay in or out of the room but not both because I would put powder all over the house.

I'm having a little trouble telling when I should go to the pottie and do a "messie." It always starts before I know it so I run to the bathroom to finish. Mamma is still proud of me cause she says so but she always has the funniest look on her face when she looks back at the trail I have left. The other day when I had to run quick I decided I'd fix up that little trail. After working hard to get it up I thought maybe Mamma would do a better job so I asked her to sweep it up. I even brought her my little broom that I had been using. Her nose sort of wrinkled up and I guess then she knew just what I wanted her to sweep up because she ran back to my room. You know something - you're not supposed to clean messes like that up with a broom. Mamma says it won't work and to please call her right away next time.

Chapter V

NEIGHBORS

There are two little boys next door to us and their names are Brucie and Chuckie. They like to play on my tractor with me. We push each other up and down the driveway on it, always being careful not to go near the street. (I learned early not to go "in, about or near the street". Unquote.) They're nice, too - we don't fight at all.

The nice lady on the other side of our house has a little white puppy. We really have lots of fun. I throw him tin cans off the trash pile and he chases them. He doesn't bring them back, though so I just keep throwing him other ones to catch. There are lots of them back there. Mamma doesn't know how they got all over the yard.

Sometimes when my playmates are busy I play by myself. I lost my football that way but I know where it is. There is a big hole on our front porch where Mama says she is going to put flowers. That's where my football is now!

I have a cute little chair that I can push and lift up and play with real easily. Our house has such shiny new floors that the minute I walked in I knew that this was the perfect place to push my chair. Mamma said that it would scratch the floor, about two seconds after I had started pushing it around like a choo choo so I took it outside. We have a long driveway and I pushed and pushed it up and down. It tripped me though and I fell down. Gosh that hurt and I just couldn't keep from crying. Mamma ran out and Allie, who was visiting us, too. They washed my face off and kept me crying because the dirt was in the sore places and besides I don't like to have my face washed. Dr. Davis (that's Brucie and Chuck's daddy) came over and looked at my new sores and said not to worry. I wasn't worried, I just hurt something awful. Then Mamma gave me a mirror when I touched the places and asked her "what's dot?" Did I look funny! I started crying all over again but soon got so sleepy I just had to go to sleep. I didn't know it but Mamma put some medicine on my sores while I was asleep so now they're all well. When Daddy came home, though, he said that I looked like the Indians had attacked me. I carefully explained just what had happened then and I was sure to tell anyone else that I saw the next few days all about what happened. Now that the places are gone I guess I won't have to keep explaining.